Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize
