Texts From Last Night

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  (440): View more from Ohio

  Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue

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  (440): Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue http://tfl.nu/47c2
  Replies (27) Good night (1270) Bad night (4994)
• Favorite

  (651): View more from Minnesota

  i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.

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  (651): i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors. http://tfl.nu/w7i6
  Replies (10) Good night (3470) Bad night (747)
• Favorite

  (734): View more from Michigan

  I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted

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  (734): I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted http://tfl.nu/844p
  Replies (25) Good night (5341) Bad night (1240)
• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness

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  (617): I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness http://tfl.nu/m7sl
  Replies (21) Good night (5743) Bad night (839)
• Favorite

  (803): View more from South Carolina

  Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock

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  (803): Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock http://tfl.nu/bp8m
  Replies (8) Good night (620) Bad night (2502)
• Favorite

  (806): View more from Texas

  We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.

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  (806): We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers. http://tfl.nu/r7l6
  Replies (16) Good night (2613) Bad night (736)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.

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  (303): Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures. http://tfl.nu/miux
  Replies (7) Good night (523) Bad night (1896)
• Favorite

  (563): View more from Iowa

  I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?

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  (563): I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join? http://tfl.nu/9f19
  Replies (5) Good night (540) Bad night (1163)
• Favorite

  (651): View more from Minnesota

  Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea

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  (651): Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea http://tfl.nu/mdyc
  Replies (14) Good night (834) Bad night (1152)
• Favorite

  (859): View more from Kentucky

  well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS

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  (859): well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS http://tfl.nu/hivl
  Replies (4) Good night (1243) Bad night (489)
• Favorite

  (614): View more from Ohio

  There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.

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  (614): There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss. http://tfl.nu/zse5
  Replies (4) Good night (494) Bad night (1208)
• Favorite

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.

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  (508): I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking. http://tfl.nu/mdga
  Replies (16) Good night (2102) Bad night (682)
• Favorite

  (614): View more from Ohio

  And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"

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  (614): And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice" http://tfl.nu/xdkd
  Replies (3) Good night (1103) Bad night (430)
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.

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  (716): banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory. http://tfl.nu/iarg
  Replies (1) Good night (1022) Bad night (241)
• Favorite

  (406): View more from Montana

  If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?

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  (406): If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins? http://tfl.nu/nbuw
  Replies (2) Good night (480) Bad night (278)

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