Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
