we have officially lost it.
You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
Randomize
