But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
Randomize
