i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
Randomize
