You don't have asthma, your pregnant
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize
