'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
I have already put on my inside pants.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
Mass text: dear whatever jerk off who thinks they stole drugs from me. It was birth control. Go fuck yourself. And pray that I don't get pregnant.
Who puts their birth control in a bottle with a smiley face?!
Oh fuck wait
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
