so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Randomize
