sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize