apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize