oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
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