after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
