Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
love makes seman taste better
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
Randomize
