we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
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