My boss' voice literally gives me gas
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
Woke up next to my vibrator and a recipe for fudge brownies. If that doesn't scream I NEED TO GET LAID, then I don't know what else could.
Randomize