i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
My friend's 9-year-old son just informed me that for a cop station, you can't use a shotgun; you have to use a machine gun. Thank you, Grand Theft Auto, for single-handedly corrupting our youth.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
