Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Randomize
