I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
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i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
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