whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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