STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
Randomize