I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Randomize
