i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
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