Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Randomize
