Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
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