DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
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