oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
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