haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
I think I am morally bankrupt
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Randomize
