last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
Randomize
