just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
Randomize