what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
