I want to stick my p in your. b.
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
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