lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
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