yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
The second time he came it projectile shot in my ear
We were in a spooning position and it shot all the way up. He was like sorry. Physics.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
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