Will you blow on my dice?
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
he told me I talked like a deaf person
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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