He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize