so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
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