I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
Randomize
