doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
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