I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
Randomize
