Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
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