We won't sleep together?
Screwed.edu
it was like his penis was on wheels.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
Randomize
