the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
True strength comes from lack of pants
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
