Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize
