You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Its about making memories worth repressing
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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