I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Randomize