We're like a lot better than the average bears
I'm gonna have a badass scar
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
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