i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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