did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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