Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
Tip for today: never try to fart and swallow at the same time. You'll end up choking on whatever you are currently swallowing and shit yourself from the freakout of choking.
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
