Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Randomize
