i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
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