He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize