I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I don't think brook has ever known best
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
Had dinner with a married woman but didn't have sex with her. Tweeted at Mike Pence to apologize anyway.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
On my way home I saw a car that had "MOVE OVER PLZ" emblazoned across the windshield backwards, so people could see it in their rearview mirror
If I ever drive for Lyft or Uber I'm definitely gonna do that
Randomize